We had just finished painting the living room, and my husband was removing the painter’s tape from the walls.
“I’ll have to get the paint out and touch up this area,” he said.
I took a look at the area he was referring to and saw that a sizable section of paint had come off with the tape.
“Was that my fault?” I asked. ” Did I mess up when I put the tape on it?”
“No, it’s not your fault,” my husband replied. “It’s your guilt.”
“My guilt? What do you mean?”
“You always think everything is your fault.” My husband chuckled. “You’ve always been like that.”
“Guess that’s because of my father,” I said. “Nothing was ever his fault, so I figured it must be my fault.”
“That was the engineer in him,” my husband said. “He’d be laughing right now if he were still alive.”
“And he never apologized,” I added. “My mother sure knew that side of him.”
We both were quiet for a moment, remembering my parents, whom we loved dearly.
My husband broke the silence. “Your mother sure got a lot of nice clothes out of it, though.”
Coming East 
George is a trip! Is he perfecting his comedy routine for when he retires from his “real” job?
You know, you may be onto something. He wants to find something to do when he retires. Stand-up may be the way to go.
Great post Susan! Guilt plagues me and my brother too. We got it from our Mom – along with worry.
Guilt is hard to live with, for sure, but I absolutely detest my anxiety. Wish I could just snap out of it. Ha!
this was a touching post… we are getting ready to paint (hopefully) in a couple of weeks. I have always been the only one who has painted, this will be our first joint painting venture. I hope it goes as smoothly as you have described yours. So good to read your writing. Wonderfully heartfelt piece. DAF
Thank you, DAF. We’ve been painting together for decades. It didn’t always go smoothly in our early years. My husband was always so particular. He’s mellowed a ton, and now I love painting with him. Hope your project turns out great.
I’ve always believed that a little guilt goes a long way. I like to be extravagant in my forgiveness of my husband – then he REALLY owes me!
Haha, NQO. I just try to stay out of trouble.
What a great, honest post! My father NEVER apologized either, for anything. His ‘take’ on things was this: “If I didn’t mean to hurt you/your feelings then I have nothing to apologize for.” And since he ‘believed’ he never did anything ‘wrong’, nothing was ever his ‘fault’ (leaving, like you, the rest of us feeling like we had to take the blame). How much better our growing up years would have been, I think, if he’d just learned to say “I’m sorry” once in a while!
He was still a great dad, though. My husband has no trouble saying he’s sorry–even when it’s not his fault!
Your husband is funny! Still, it made me think….”things” only soothe the heart temporarily, and then again sometimes that’s all we need because life goes on.
I like what you said, Suzicate. I’m sure there were many times my mother would have loved an apology instead of a new outfit. But the clothes were like an apology–without my dad having to admit any guilt.