Fifty Shades of Gray

Though I have not read the book everyone is talking about, I know enough about people to see how deeply in bondage many of them are. To be so torn between doing what is natural and what is unnatural but satisfying must be torture. I have yet to experience that kind of bondage, but it is only a matter of time. Really, is going gray so terrible?

IMG_0896My daughter is a beauty. She shares her father’s dark coloring, and, like him, she started getting a few gray hairs when she was just out of high school. I don’t know when she started coloring her hair, but I have never seen it gray. I think she would be beautiful if it were purple. Lately, she has been toying with the idea of finally letting her true colors show. Not the true colors she was born with, which she now has by artificial means, but the true colors that would be showing if she were being true to herself. This is all so confusing to me. Maybe I need to read the book.

CIMG2409Now that I think of it, I have no idea what color hair my girlfriends and sisters-in-law really have. Only their hairdressers know for sure. My husband had jet black hair when I met him, and now it is completely gray. And he looks gorgeous.  Why is it so much easier for men to go gray than it is for women?
g69-HSdaysAs for me, I was once a redhead. Since that is one color that never looks natural coming from a bottle, I never even tried to duplicate it when it started fading. I haven’t the energy, patience, or money to keep it colored, so I prefer to go au naturel.

I hope my daughter has the courage to get out from under the stigma of gray hair.

Women, toss that book in the trash. Embrace your grayness.  Escape that bondage.

I hope I haven’t spoiled the book for you.

About Coming East

I am a writer, wife, mother, and grandmother who thinks you're never too old until you're dead. My inspiration is Grandma Moses who became a successful artist in her late 70's. If I don't do something pretty soon, though, I'll have to find someone older for inspiration.
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46 Responses to Fifty Shades of Gray

  1. Sandy says:

    Awesome pic – I assume it’s you. I’m back to teaching yoga for the summer. Do you still come?

  2. Rosie A says:

    Please let us know if you’re still blogging? We miss you.

  3. Rose Ann says:

    Are you still blogging?

  4. Rosie Jacobs says:

    Are you still blogging and how often do you post? Just found your blog over a month ago and nothing new has been posted.

  5. pattisj says:

    I do know some men who color their hair. I think it’s sad that so many people aren’t free to be themselves.

  6. Margie says:

    If I had a magic wand, I’d wave it over the women of the world and make them all happy with their looks, with no intervention from the ‘beauty industry’. Then, grey hair wouldn’t be about courage, it would just be about who you are.

    “The maturing of a woman who has continued to grow is a beautiful thing to behold. Or, if your ad revenue or your seven-figure salary or your privileged sexual status depend on it, it is an operable condition.” Naomi Wolf

  7. what a lovely family you have! I have to apologize for not keeping up my part of the pact we had… I will try to be better. Loved this! I have several shades of gray, don’t think I have gotten up to fifty yet, but, maybe I have… I love my gray hair, it is freeing to just be natural, isn’t it? Thanks for the laugh, hope you are well.

  8. Robin says:

    You are all so beautiful. 🙂 I let my hair go back to its natural color (gray, white, silver, brown, with some red thrown in because I was once a redhead, too) and kept it that way for about a year. I started coloring it again because I looked about 20 years older than my husband (and he’s older than me). I’m afraid vanity got the better of me, for now. I’m rockin’ some purple while I’m at it. I figured if I was going to go back to coloring it, I might as well have colors I really like.

  9. Helen C says:

    Beautiful family!
    I stopped coloring my hair a year ago and I love it. Some friends told me that gray hair made me look older. I think it’s better to feel young than look young. 😉

  10. Cecilia says:

    You’re right, it still needs courage, I think. Not only because of society’s opinion, but because of the own. Great post, thanks.

  11. Lynn says:

    What a fun read! I too, was a redhead as a young person. At about the age of 10, it turned more of a strawberry blonde, much to my grandmother’s dismay.

    I have a few friends who have embraced their gray & they look great! I may join them some day but until then, I’ll keep the highlights;)

    • Coming East says:

      Do you know any men who dye their hair, Lynn? I don’t. Why is that? Why do we women feel such a need and men don’t?

      • Lynn says:

        I think the odd man might dye his hair or use a product to deter the gray but you are absolutely right, there are not many.

        We live in a world where we are surrounded with media suggesting that it is seemingly crucial that we all stay looking young, slim & flawless.

        I have no desire to look like I did when I was 25 but it appears the marketing crap thrown our way tells us we should. I am always stunned by some of the commercials advertising products for youthful skin. The models appear to be no more than between the ages of 20 – 30. I suspect they don’t know what a wrinkle even looks like!

      • Coming East says:

        I wish I had listened to my mother much earlier. She always said, “Moisturize, moisturize, moisturize!

  12. ChrisB says:

    I’ve been grey for years and it doenst trouble me in the slightest. But then i am a man. And i do tend to call it ‘silver’ ha…

  13. Amy says:

    Your daughter is a Beauty, Susan!!

  14. Like your beautiful daughter, grey hairs started sprouting out of my head quite early (when I was in my late teens; my father used to stand behind me and pluck them out! I ignored them until they started gathering groups, and I’ve been colouring my hair ever since (I do it myself at home; I’m fortunate to have found an inexpensive product that exactly matches my natural colour). I did experiment one summer by letting it go, but there was way too much grey for my liking (I felt OLD!) My husband has gone completely grey (curiously, he wasn’t grey at all in our wedding pictures from 12 years ago :() and it doesn’t bother him a bit, but I think I’ll keep the grey at bay for a little while longer!

    • Coming East says:

      If I had dark hair, I bet I would color the gray, too. But I take after my mother whose beautiful strawberry blond hair gradually turned platinum. Mine isn’t platinum, but it does have blond steaks, and the rest is pretty light so it’s hard to tell it is gray.

  15. Hilarious take on 50 Shades…. I haven’t read the book or seen the movie. Agree — it’s very hard to replicate our natural red hair in later years. I stopped coloring — can’t see wasting the time and money in the salons and after one botched home job- I quit. Freedom!

  16. dorannrule says:

    What a beautiful family!

  17. Beautiful family! You are right..your daughter would be incredibly gorgeous in any shade!
    I didn’t read the book nor have interest in seeing an abusive relationship played out on screen. I was also disappointed the media machine decided releasing the movie on Valentine’s was the way to go. Talk about subverting a holiday based on love and sweetness! I was even more aghast when so many of my friends/neighbors flocked o see it.
    As an aside, did you see the really GREAT article written about the movie in the The Atlantic? If not, I know you would appreciate it!

  18. notquiteold says:

    My sisters both let themselves go gray, and they look just like me, so I have the benefit of a preview. And though I love my sisters, my strong belief is: NOT YET!

  19. I started to go gray, as did my mother, around age 30. It was a beautiful frame to my face. Then, one morning I woke up and realized my face and hair were the same color ~ and I started to color. I continue to color until I retired. I made the decision if I was going to retire, I could no longer afford to color my hair. My very talented hair dresser colored my hair the color it “would be” while she begged me not to do it. It grew out with not yucky roots. I haven’t looked back and have embraced my 50 shades of shades of gray for 13 years now!!

  20. Dianna says:

    Wow – your daughter is gorgeous, and your husband is so handsome! And look at you with that beautiful red hair!
    I do color mine, and every once in awhile, I contemplate just letting it be, but I haven’t gotten up that courage yet.
    Cute post!

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