Does Your Stick Need Waxing?

I may not have a stick of my own, but I know how to handle one, none-the-less. You don’t get to be a woman my age without learning a thing or two.  A stick here in this resort community gets quite a workout. That’s because we like to show our visitors a good time. Of course, our locals use their sticks a lot, too. Nearly every day. Some, if they’re in good shape, can even be seen handling their sticks several times a day, but that can wear a person out, so I wouldn’t recommend it.

Here’s where I want to help you out by suggesting a product that makes stick-handling smooth and effortless, fast, but not too fast, so the enjoyment lasts longer. After all, you want to be flying high for as long as you can. No premature releases, for sure!

The product is called Mr. Zogs Sex Wax, and it is guaranteed to give your stick the ride of its life. It’s sold in many shops along the Oceanfront and online. No, don’t thank me. This is a public service announcement from a little old lady in the resort town of Virginia Beach. I’m not even getting paid for this. Can you believe it? I just want you to have the best time of your life with your stick. So run out and get some Mr. Zogs and enjoy.


You did know I was talking about surfing, right?

About Coming East

I am a writer, wife, mother, and grandmother who thinks you're never too old until you're dead. My inspiration is Grandma Moses who became a successful artist in her late 70's. If I don't do something pretty soon, though, I'll have to find someone older for inspiration.
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45 Responses to Does Your Stick Need Waxing?

  1. Robin says:

    LOL! I did know… but even so… my mind wandered elsewhere. 😉

  2. E.C. says:

    lol you are too funny. 😆

  3. oldereyes says:

    I did. I’m from CA, Dudette. I prefer Sticky Bumps Day-Glo, myself.

  4. pattisj says:

    I wonder how many people saw this and ordered some. Are you still hanging out at the surf shop?

    • Coming East says:

      This was a different surf shop than the one at Hilltop. This one is down on 17th street, next to the Star of the Sea Catholic Church. It’s the best surf shop in the area. I saw a whole bunch of small surfboards that were called “sticks” right on the front of them, and then I saw jars of Mr. Zogs. Do you think a blogger like me could leave that alone, Patti?

  5. You are riot! I thought you meant board all the time I was reading.. great play on words… DAF

    • Coming East says:

      George and I were in our favorite surf shop, buying a body board for our son-in-law, and I saw that jar of surfboard wax, DAF. The name was too good not to do anything with it.

  6. I am still laughing so hard my stomach hurts!

  7. Huffygirl says:

    Whew. Thought I had stumbled onto the wrong site. Or that you had taken a definitely un-Susan-like turn. Here in Michigan most people don’t think about surf boards, and if we did, we would call them by their appropriate name. Otherwise, everyone would think we were talking about something else.

  8. Al says:

    That’s what really sold me on Patty when I met her. She could really wax a stick. I think it was because she spent so much time in Hawaii.

  9. John Hric says:

    I am so, so very glad you did not include the Mr. Miyagi lesson. I would have to report you to the beach guard as a hazard to navigation…. Oh my oh my. I think I will go take a said-a-give and calm down now.

  10. ROFLOL!! I think the people in the coffee shop thing there is something seriously wrong with me right now. That just made my morning. Thanks mom

  11. Thanks for this early morning trip down “the road not usually travelled.” I kept thinking “I should know this, I live in a beach town, a mile from the sandy shore… then I read the lid, “warm water surfing.” It will take a few more years of global warming before Maine is considered warm water. We do, however, have surfers so I should have known ~ I couldn’t get off the hockey field (must be in influence of the Stanley Cup finals this week). Anyway, like you and your writing, glad to see it never spoils!

  12. Mark says:

    What a great surprise ending! I thought it was about hockey.

  13. LOL Actually I DID know you meant surfing…right from the first sentence!…I live in a resort town too! hahahahahaha

  14. LOL! I was windering till the end what on earth was a ‘stick’, and thinking the worst possible things that it could be!
    Thanks for letting me breathe easier:D

  15. Dianna says:

    No….I know NOTHING about surfing, although I have seen decals on folks’ cars for sex wax. I’m not familiar with the word stick as it refers to surfing though….guess I would if I lived nearer the beach!

  16. I think I need a cigarette, but I don’t smoke…lol.

  17. Was wondering… like the image of you on a surfboard!

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