Yesterday morning I read of an HBO documentary about the fight to end the ban on interracial marriage. A young couple who fell in love in Virginia in the late 1950’s could not marry because Virginia was a state that banned marriage between couples of different races. They traveled to Washington, D.C., to marry but were arrested as soon as they returned to Virginia. They fought the law, and in 1967 the U.S. Supreme Court overturned it. The reason Virginia banned interracial marriage in the first place was that the majority of the voters believed that marriage between races was an abomination in the eyes of God. Believe it or not, there are a good number of people today who still think it is wrong. You will never change some people’s minds.
Yesterday’s article naturally led me to think about the issue of gay marriage and it’s ban in most of the country. I know race and sex are two different things, but I can’t help but wonder when it comes to love, why are so many people against allowing two people in love to marry each other if they are of the same sex? This troubles my heart so greatly that I can’t keep silent. Life is hard enough. Why do we have to make it harder for some people?
I’m all about love. If you’re lucky enough to find it, then it needs to be protected. Why should people like Newt Gingrichget to decide that a loving couple cannot marry unless they are of opposite sexes? Is love more sacred between a man and a woman? So same sex couples having a loving and committed relationship is an abomination, but what people like Gingrich do, and quite a few evangelical ministers, I might add, such as cheating on their wives and being serial monogamists, is not?
One of the arguments proponents of the ban offer is that only marriage between a man and a woman can produce children, and we need to protect that. What about the thousands of people who produce offspring outside the bonds of marriage or the couples who marry who don’t want any children? How on earth does marriage between homosexuals hurt procreation? Some supporters of the ban also say that equal legal rights can be given without marriage. But there is something so special about marriage that nothing less is equal. Empty arguments, both of these reasons.
I do not believe the Bible is fact. I believe it is Truth, but the men who wrote it were bound by the knowlege of their times. They did not understand homosexuality as we do today. They believed it was a choice, not a part of who a person is. I don’t think it should matter anyway. If you are one of the people who think the Bible teaches homosexuality is wrong, I’m not trying to change your mind. You are entitled to your opinion. I’m just reminding you that the Bible is not the law of the land; the Constitution is. I hope that love wins out.
Very well said, Susan. Here in NZ we have civil unions between gay couples but not marriage. To get the legislation passed took ages and it only came into being in around 2008/9 and when I was the wedding coordinator at the historical church here in Wellington we had only three CUs and 94+ marriages in the year. One wonders how many of the marriages have lasted and will last. Two of the CUs were dignified, quiet affairs and I was proud to have some association with them. Complete contrast to some of the marriages.
When will we learn that all men and women are equal and must have equal rights? I have friends (two gay men) who have been together in a loving relationship for more than 20 years. How can we say that their love deserves less recognition than yours or mine?
Love your comment, Judith.
How about we just abolish government recognized marriages and the privileges it has in our country and then everyone can “love” everyone without any standards? Then we’d all be on equal terms.
Not sure why you put quotation marks around the word love, Tammy.
so glad that you are my mom
Thank you, Daughter. And I’m so glad you’re my daughter.
Great, great post Susan. While I’m a fiscal and less government conservative, I firmly believe that things like gay marriage, woman’s right to choose, assisted suicide and any other personal choice has no business being legislated. The fundamentalists in the Republican party will eventually be responsible for it’s downfall.
Yea, Big Al! I’m glad to hear that it’s actually possible to be conservative and reasonable. I don’t get it when people who supposedly want less government want to legislate the morality of others so it matches theirs.
True love is a rare gift, and it does conquer all. Thank you for expressing this message so vividly!
Thanks for your comment, Shanghai.
I’m glad you brought up this discussion.
Thanks, Patti. I think some people are hesitant to say how they really feel because of a fear of being bullied by the religious right. This should not be a religious issue.
Very well said. This issue troubles me because it’s a classic example of forcing one’s beliefs on others. With the heterosexual divorce rate at 50%, I can’t help but think that male/female marriages are preserving the sanctity of marriage!
Yes, it’s laughable to think that homosexual marriage would hurt the already dismal divorce rate, Leah!
I believe love is a a rare treasure, and anyone is lucky who finds it. Anyone.
Well put! “Bible is not the law of the land; the Constitution is.”– Powerful statement! I can’t agree more. Thank you, Susan!
Thank you, Amy. And my statement comes from someone who loves the Lord with all her heart.
You are so right and stated the need to let love win out so well. It amazes me that officials and governments and such want to legislate love. It is tough enough for relationships to work, I wish all who are in love the best of luck in staying the course. Not allowing some to marry is just so silly and mean spirited.
Yes, it is mean spirited, Patti. Mperfect word.
Acceptance, love and tolerance could go a very long way in making our world a better place.
Sadly, we live in a country that needs to work on those things, Bella. We like to point fingers, though, don’t we?
Very well-put. If marriage is so sacrosanct, then why is it that two loving people who are same-sex are not afforded the same rights as someone who has married and divorced numerous times, but always with the opposite sex?
Double standard, Lexy?
that, and the arguments they’re using against same-sex marriage are a facade behind which to hide their “I just don’t like it!” non-argument.
Well said, Lexy. That’s all it’s about.
Its easy to pick out acts of some. Not all spouses cheat. The reality about the constitution is that it doesn’t say much. The fact is most people have never taken the time to read it. The whole issue of gay marriage will be decided by the Supreme Court which it should. There is the serious issue of reciprocity between the states that needs to be dealth with. The most mis-quoted things in this country are the constitution and the Bible.
I think it is an issue of human rights, 1959, so that is definitely something that should be decided by the Supreme Court. Yes, I know that all people don’t cheat in marriage, but I’m tired of the piety of so many of those who spout Scripture but are such hypocrites.
You expressed what’s in my heart so vividly. Thank you. Love really does conquer all. There’s room for everyone.
Besides, if a particular religion or church is against a marriage (for whatever reason), it is not forced to officiate or condone.
You’re absolutely right, Adela. I’m not out to change people’s minds about what they believe. I just want them to leave people alone that don’t believe the same thing.
Thanks for the support and understanding. I always quote Jimmy Baker and that other evangelist who had affairs behind their wives backs. Not to mention the hideous acts committed by some members of churches on children. There are far worse things to befall humankind than gays marrying.
With all the evil in this world, you would think people would have better things to do than pick on a group who has done nothing but love each other, GCB. Jim and Tammy Faye are classic examples!
Mt gran said that shortly before she died. I asked her why she spent 40 years on her own. My grand dad died before I was born. She told me she never found anyone else that matched up to him and the died at 83 which was a good innings. She said she wanted to see me married before she died and she would die a happy woman. I’ll continue to fight as the movement is rapidly gaining a foothold here. Our federal leader of the opposition says it’s against gods will (he is an ex trainee priest) and our Prime Minister, and unmarried atheist woman living with her boy friend at The Lodge, says a marriage is between a man and a woaan. It’s an odd stance for a former unionist. There is no jistice is there?
I agree that hopefully, love will win out. Paired with that love is acceptance. We need to return to the constitution and the ideology upon which our nation was founded to be our guiding star. America was founded upon freedom from oppression. Yet, various aspects of our society have, and continue to, oppress other members of our society whose skin color, nationality, lifestyle and sexual orientation is not a direct match to their own. Shame on them. America is a nation whose foundation is a gathering of individuals who love their neighbors and are all free to bring the best they have to offer to the cause of freedom and the building of community with acceptance.
So well said, Carol! Thanks for that thoughtful comment.
I always think about the US as being streets ahead in all things. I loved visiting there and I love the people, mostly. I did have a spot of bother with some Christians running a B and B in New England who wouldn’t let my otherhalf and I share the same room! needless to say we didn’t stay on.
I’m disappointed in us, too, GCB. And I’m surprised that California is against homosexual marriage because they like to tout themselves as being so modern and expressive. Glad your granny was such a loving woman. She’s a good role model for you!